


Things You Can't Unsee

by Lasgalendil



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Accidental Outing, Boys Kissing, Darcy Lewis is a trashy fanficcer, Gay Bucky Barnes, M/M, Making Out, Pepper is so done, Public Blow Jobs, Stucky - Freeform, Thor is surprisingly okay with this, deny deny deny, tony stark is a little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-18
Updated: 2015-12-18
Packaged: 2018-05-07 09:23:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5451629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lasgalendil/pseuds/Lasgalendil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony Stark hadn’t really meant to get Cap out of the closet. Hell, Tony didn't even know Cap was IN the closet. Truth be told, he was just being his usual dickish self. </p><p>…or wherein James Buchanan Barnes finds 2014 to be a very welcoming place.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things You Can't Unsee

So Barnes had been there for—what?—months now. Never left Steve’s floor of the tower. Sure, there’s the protesters outside, the digging from the reporters, the slurs all over the internet and the distrust, but honestly, a bit of a PR nightmare isn’t anything new for Pepper. Cleaning up Tony’s messes is actually down in her job description (he’d know-he wrote her employment contract. Pepper said she wasn’t letting him anywhere near their wedding vows.). And other than the throng of protesters swarming Stark Tower, you’d never know Bucky Barnes was alive, let alone sleeping a few floors down.  
  
…alright. So sleeping was probably an overstatement. As far as Tony knew—as far as anyone but Cap, Sam, JARVIS, and the World Security Council’s appointed therapists knew—Winter Boy’s scrambled eggs didn’t need sleep. Robocop here probably just recharged from a wall socket or something.  
  
“Gala. You coming?”  
“Can’t,” Rogers said. “Bucky—“  
“Cap, you’re the face of the Avengers. The First Avenger’s gotta show up sometime.”  
“Fair enough.”  
“Bring your boytoy if it makes you feel better.”  
“I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”  
“Whoa, whoa, Rogers. I’m pretty sure what you meant was you can ‘neither confirm nor deny’—“  
Needless to say, Rogers had been unamused.  
  
But later that night America’s Greatest Hero did in fact, grace them with his presence. And, to everyone’s surprise, there was a hunched over, unshaven creature with dark circles under its eyes and shaggy hair traveling in his wake.  
  
“Who invited Gollum?”  
“Be _nice_ ,” Pepper hissed, stomping his toes with her stiletto.  
“You lips say one thing, but your body language says you haven’t forgotten how much I like BDSM.”  
“Ass.”  
“What can I say. I toss a mean salad—“  
  
But Rogers was going around the room, whole body a shield for the silent shadow behind him. And slightly drunk Tony just couldn’t resist the temptation, really.  “Oh, look. It’s Cap’s psycho-brainwashed assassin boyfriend everyone’s always talking about,” Tony grabbed the flesh arm before Barnes could retreat and shook it. Hard.. “Stark. Tony Stark. Nice to finally meet you.”  
  
_You killed my father, prepare to die._ But the Kid wouldn’t get the reference. And even for Tony Stark—even now more than 30 years later—it was still Too Soon.  
“I—what—no—“  
“Stark,” Steve bristled.  
“He—he told you?” Barnes asked, hesitant, horrified, dark eyes flitting around the room, shrinking into himself.  
…and the expression on Cap’s face. Fuckin’ priceless.  
_Well, fuck_. Tony thought. _It was_ _TRUE-_? Then: _Forty-seven academics just punched the air._  
“You told them,” he whined.  
“Buck—“  
But Barnes fell into him, open-mouthed, kissing and messy, making positively sinful little whimpering sounds through his upturned lips, eyes closed, tongue lolling over, against, inside Steve’s gasping mouth.  
  
Aaaaand Tony felt his brain explode along with the beer bottle in front of his feet. Steve “Stars and Stripes” Rogers, aka Captain America, was passionately making out. In public. With a dude.  
…Howard would’ve loved this.  
  
The room of gathered Avengers broke out into laughter. A smattering of cheers and applause.  
“Rogers, you dog!” Nat called.  
“About fucking time,” Sam was grinning. “I kept telling you it wasn’t 1945!”  
“Well damn, son,” Fury said. “Nobody tell Coulson, or your boy there better watch his back.”  
“I miss something?” Barton wondered, frowning and adjusting his hearing aids, turning from face to face bewilderedly. “Guys! What’s going on—?”  
“I—what?” Pepper asked, dumbfounded. “No really, _what_ —?!”  
Hill just stood there, gawking.  
Jane Foster gaped. Thor chuckled, cried out “ANOTHER!” as that sloppy make-out session came to a gasping end (as if Cap needed encouraging, his hands clenched on Barnes’ ass and all). Darcy Lewis simply let out a whisper of “oh god yes” and started filming.  
  
Alright, so it was good for a laugh. And sure. Maybe it was their first kiss since 1945 (alright it was painfully, awkwardly, _most definitely_ their first fucking kiss since 1945, Tony thought), but nobody wanted to see that beyond the initial shock and amusement but Rogers showed no signs of stopping, no sir, and Barnes was making noises in a plaintive pitch he’d never even heard in _pornos_ and would you look at that, the room was clearing, Nat’s smile stretched into a shit-eating grin while Sam just stared back over his shoulder, shaking his head as Pepper ushered them all out, her freckled face aflame.  
“Okay, that’s enough,” Tony frowned. “We get it, you’re comfortable enough in your respective masculinities to make out in public. You can stop now.”  
“Guys? Guys you can really stop now.”  
“Okay you’ve proved your point.”  
“Guys?”  
“Alright, alright Cap we get it—“  
“Guys—“  
“Oh, shit—“  
“Would you two get a fucking room—“  
“OH MY GOD, CAP.” And the image of James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes going down, freeing Steve’s not-nearly-flaccid-cock and lovingly giving head ruined every memory of a certain childhood stuffed animal, not to mention a lifetime’s collection of Captain America comics and memorabilia.  
  
“Out,” Pepper yanked his arm. “Anthony Stark, for the love of God would you just give them the fucking room?”  
  
“So...” Tony said, holding the door shut behind his back. “Cap’s gay.”  
“Ass,” Pepper remonstrated yet again.  
“Yeah. You’re right. That’s probably next.”


End file.
